Sunday, October 13, 2013

My journey...so far.

Imagine being told, (at 21 years old and newly married) that you will never have a child without the help of science. That it will take prescription meds, countless hours of crying, and possibly some extreme procedures just for you to have a baby. 

This is my life. I was diagnosed Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome with about a year after I got married in May of 2010. I stopped taking BC the month we got married, and after a year of no periods and no baby, I knew something was wrong. I went to my OB/GYN to get checked. She did blood tests and confirmed that I had PCOS, and it was going to take some work to get pregnant. 

And here we are, 3 1/2 years later, still with no baby. And I'm not going to lie, it sucks pretty bad. 

I've always had irregular periods. And when I say "irregular," I mean I can go months without having one, and then *BAM* I'll have one for 8 weeks straight. It's so hard not knowing what's going on with your own body. The unknown aspect of infertility scares the living crap out of me. 

I always have a billion and 1 questions running through my mind...

"Why isn't my body responding to the medication?" "Why can't I have a normal reproductive system?" "Will I ever experience the feeling of my own baby kicking the hell out of me?" "How come every drunken 17 year old can get pregnant by accident, but I can't get pregnant on purpose?" etc...

Infertility is a disease that hurts me more than anything in this world, but I believe I was put on this Earth to be a Mama. So even if it takes pills, surgeries, timed intercourse (sexy, huh?), tests, mood swings, and lots of $$$$$$$, I WILL be a mother! I have no doubt in my mind that God will bless us beyond measure with a baby of our own. 

Until then, I will document every test, mood swing, and procedure to share with others going through the exact same thing as me. I know I'm not alone, and we will get through this together!


-Melanie 

2 comments:

  1. Good luck! Happy to have found a new blog in a similar situation! Excited to follow your journey!

    ReplyDelete

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